guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
