Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
