I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Randomize
