awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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