Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize