WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
