The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We were destined to go to rehab together
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
