She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize