Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
