I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
