btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
