If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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