hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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