Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize