fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
