It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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