Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize