Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
