How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize
