You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
