Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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