I got chris browned last night
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
