I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize