doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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