Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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