Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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