drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
