fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
It's rum buckets o'clock
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
