i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
