i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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