I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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