Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
