We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Randomize
