He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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