Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize