Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize