Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
