soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
