These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
