Pants 0. Shit 1.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
