I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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