is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
