I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
