I wish I could punch you in the face.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize