2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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