he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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