Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
if i can run in heels then i can drive
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We had sex on a dog bed..
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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