2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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