He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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