Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
being pregnant is like rehab
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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