Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
