spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You're like the curious george of whores
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
